i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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