very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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