Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
