I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
