wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
