I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
