The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
