Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
