doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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