oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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