I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Randomize
