Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
