I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I think your dad took our porno
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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