it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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