Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
