Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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