i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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