I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
