so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
