at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
he fucked my hip out of place.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
