it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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