my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize