The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
that is very illegal...i love you.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
