if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
