Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize
