This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
