Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
