how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
