i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
