i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Randomize
