Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
