NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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