I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
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