A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I wish there were birth control emojis
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize