it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
