so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Randomize
