I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I'm sobbing to NWA
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
