If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
