Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Randomize
