Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
