Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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