I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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