Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Randomize
