why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
now i know why i became what i already was.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
