hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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