i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
