And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Randomize
