I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
