is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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