Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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